Release day marks a very special day in an author’s journey. It’s the day when we finally get to share our baby with the world. Writing a book is a labor of love. From the wondrous moment when inspiration strikes, through getting to know the characters, who they are, how they react, what their motivations are … essentially, what makes them tick, it is a journey with ups and downs. Hours upon hours of research, writing, and the never-ending editing cycle go into each book for me and when at last it is deemed done, we send it off to gain someone else’s acceptance for publication. And even after the publishing home is determined, there are more hours spent on getting the book ready for its final debut.

Up until release day, the book is our own. We can mold and shape at will and a bajillion times do a last minute tweak or two. But once it is released, the book belongs to the world and each reader brings their own experiences to the act of reading and we, the author, the creator, are no longer in control. We cannot tell people how to read the book … the reader will either see what we intended to put on the page or they won’t.

So, The Journal of Angela Ashby no longer belongs just to me … may the world embrace Angela, Mallory, Tatiana, and the rest of the characters and story — it is your time to fly, Angela. And now it is time for me to focus on my next work.

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The post Book Birthday for Angela appeared first on Be the Cat.

I love this picture because it epitomizes the little piece of paper I fished out of the Jar Full of Smiles. It states:

A good friend is cheaper than therapy.

Having friends is essential in life, whether they run around on two legs or four — and there are advantages to both kinds. In the image for this post, the dog is being a fantastic friend by just being with his friend, listening to what he has to say, not judging. Sometimes the best thing in the world, when you have too much on your heart and mind, is to tell all to your dog (or the neighbor’s dog) because you know with certainty, they will never tell another living soul what you said. It is cathartic to bare your soul and get all the niggling things bothering you off your chest. And your dog will understand the depth of your feelings and do their best to make you feel better, while at the same time be happy they are spending time with you.

But sometimes, we need a little bit more. We not only need someone to listen … we need some sort of acknowledgement that our problems have been heard and there is understanding of what we’re experiencing. And not only to share the bad things with, we need friends to share the good times with, too. How sad would it be to be bursting with good news and have no one to tell? We need someone to laugh and be silly with as well as someone’s shoulder to cry on when needed.

And friends are there for us because we are there for them … it should be a two-way street. Remember: “We don’t have to do all of it alone. We were never meant to.” — Brené Brown So, if the street is only one way, then it may be time to think about changing things up in the friendship circle. I’ll leave you with a couple of questions to think about.

• What makes a good friend?
• What kind of friend are you?

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The post Jar Full of Smiles: Friendship Therapy appeared first on Be the Cat.

I have read the article posted a few times to make sure I didn’t misread something — but I didn’t. Initially, I saw a post which referenced the article and since I was concerned about a psychologist encouraging a ban, I made sure to dig until I found the original article, because there was always the possibility she had been misquoted. She hadn’t. She wrote the article … and it is difficult to misquote yourself. I was disappointed to find according to her bio that Barbara Greenberg blogs as “The Teen Doctor” for Psychology Today. When I was young and working out what I wanted to be when I grew up, my answer was psychologist as being a writer was unlikely to pay the bills. I’m probably one of the few pre-teens to ever have a subscription to Psychology Today. Okay, so it was my mother’s subscription, but I’m the one who read it from cover to cover as soon as it arrived. Why would I be disappointed in Psychology Today? Because they employ someone with faulty (and potentially dangerous) thought processes to blog for teens. And I used to revere their articles as gospel.

Because I took such exception to the article and the ideas espoused, this will probably be the first blog post on this issue, but not the last. No one wants to read a 350 page rebuttal to a US News article, and I’d rather focus on one point at a time. So, let’s start with the concept of best friends. One of the problems I had with the article was the lack of acceptance that it is possible to have multiple “best friends” … while the term can mean a single friend, it can also refer to a small group where you are all best friends which is why the best friend jewelry industry runs to making pendants that have more than two parts.

At no point in the article did Dr. Greenberg ever intimate the possibility of having more than one best friend. Yet, ironically, in the middle of the article about banning best friends in favor of small groups of close friends is a link to the article on The Promise and Perils of Friendship Threesomes posted earlier in the year. Both of these posts are in the Health section of US News. Now I’m confused, US News … you run an article stating that having best friends is bad, and you also have run an article about the dangers of having a small group of friends. So are you anti-friend? Or is it that you’ll allow anyone to state their opinion as an authority just so you have content?

Anyway, my point is that we have an authority stating a premise where anything that contradicts the premise is conveniently left out or ignored. Which is not exactly the best method to employ when you are stating a position where you want people to accept your word on the matter as the expert. Because such a basic variable to the conclusion was ignored, you have lost my acceptance of you as an authority. The premise developed a hole I could drive a semi through, so it is no longer valid.

The post The Ban on Best Friends appeared first on Be the Cat.

I post about the issues encountered by my characters in my books. Things like grief, homelessness, abuse, underage drinking, bullying, etc. and I realized that in life, while I always look for the positive, I haven’t been sharing that side with my readers. It’s time I started. So, I’m going to share my Jar of Smiles with you. The first note drawn from the jar is:

A friend is someone who can see the truth and pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else.

How true. My thoughts immediately went to my bestie who sees the truth and pain in me even when I cannot see it myself. When I am so focused on convincing myself that everything is okay, she just KNOWS when things are not right with me. Which is good because I have the type of personality that just keeps pushing forward on the premise that if I’m not dead, I must be doing ALL the things. She keeps me balanced, tells me when I need to rest, and knows immediately when something is bothering me. We all need a friend like her.

The part that struck me even more was the part about even when you are fooling everyone else. The presumption is that we put on our happy mask to face the world, not allowing anyone to see our pain. We hide our vulnerability from the world because far too often, instead of seeing the vulnerability and helping to repair the damage, society sees a reason to feast on the pain of others. When you’re feeling pain, the last thing you want is to invite someone to rub salt in the wound, so we mask it and pretend everything is okay. When it isn’t.

What a condemnation of our culture. Because mocking someone’s vulnerabilities, or actively seeking to cause them more pain is something we learn. Does it make us feel better about our own lives? I doubt it, but again, it is about the mask the person inflicting the pain puts on for the outside world. I think about how a small child would react vs. adults in a situation, and I would rather react with the sympathy and heart of a child, unfettered by having been taught to condemn. Imagine the difference if we were to all choose to do the same?

Back to the green strip of paper … I have been so blessed by the people in my life. Those who are there for me, no matter what I’m going through. Those who take the time to see what I sometimes cannot see myself. Those who make sure I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I am not going through life alone. And yes, just thinking about that makes me smile.

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Photo of Tim: © Alptraum | Dreamstime.com
Creek Photo: © David Coleman | Dreamstime.com

In a Read it before you can buy it measure, I’ve decided to post a few snippets from the companion book to the Misfit McCabe series I have been working on. The title of the eventual book is Diary of a Misfit and will be available in ebook only (or at least that’s the plan for now). I am concurrently working on the companion book and One Way Ticket Home which will be the fourth book in the series.

Anyway, while working on the stories, which will be parts of Katie McCabe’s diary, giving a little of the background which doesn’t actually make it into the novels, Katie’s thoughts on some of the things that happen in the books, as well as her thoughts on current events.

Tim’s Shiner is a glimpse into the past with Katie and her best friend, Tim Lawrence and gives some insight on Tim’s family situation. I’m going to post the first couple paragraphs here, and then provide a link to the full story (which is 3,100 words, so short and quickly read).

When her best friend Tim shows up on her doorstep with a black eye, Katie McCabe teases him for being a klutz, until she learns the horrifying truth.

Tim’s Shiner

I ran into my room and dove on the bed. How could I be such a horrible friend? My eyes traced the whorls in the ceiling support beam as tears welled. I hammered my fist against the mattress. Frustration and rage made me want to scream, but if I did, Timmy might hear me. And that would make things worse.
     Closing my eyes, I inhaled deeply. As I forced the air out of my lungs, I grabbed my diary from the nightstand and sat up. Maybe writing everything out would help.
     Today started off like any other day. But it might have ended as the worst day in all my twelve years….

* * * * *

“Katie, hurry up!”
     Most people knocked on the door, but not Timmy. When we had plans, he’d stand on the grass outside my room and yell.
     “The fish’ll be takin’ a nap if you wait much longer.” He held both our fishing poles and the can for worms.
     I poked my head out the window. “Keep your pants on, why doncha? I just hafta get my shoes on.” Scrambling to the closet, I shoved my feet into sneakers, and headed out the door, laces flopping with each step. I yanked the front door open and a blast of heat barreled in. Another scorcher, but summer would be over too soon, the weather would cool, and we’d be stuck inside.

Link to the Complete Story: Tim’s Shiner – Absolutely Free!

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May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch…

This saying reminds me of how Monica looks at life. She is a take-no-prisoners, no-holds-barred kind of person. Her mind is sharp, intuitive, and she possesses one of the most wicked talents in writing I have ever run across and she has the wicked wit to match. I met Monica online through the #wipfire hashtag and I promptly fell in love with the writing. Watch this one because she is a rising star, which as soon as she reaches the launchpad is going to take off like a rocket. She has a way of asking a question (especially when I’m unbalanced) and all of a sudden, perspective is gained, and I am able to continue on with the writing with greater clarity. She has amazing knowledge and I want to soak up as much from her as I can.

Linda on the other hand is one of the few online friends met outside of Twitter. She and I met through an independent book review I review for. She posted her book Along Came a Demon and requested a review, and I read, reviewed, and LOVED it, and a friendship was born. Linda and I support one another through all of the trials of putting our books out in the best shape possible. We have laughed, cried, and screamed together, cajoled one another through the rough patches, celebrated in the good times, and mourned in sorrow. (By the way, in the pic, I’m the pup not paying attention to what’s going on with my tongue lolling out.) I have enjoyed watching Linda grow as a writer and was perhaps even more excited than she was when she was approached by an agent wanting to rep her Whisperings series. We are definitely in this thing called the writing game together.

So when the time came for me to plan vacation for 2010 and the original plan included a trip to Washington, I kept looking at the map and decided that Utah where Linda lives wasn’t too far out of the way, I’d make sure I stopped by to meet her in person. Then, as my friendship with Monica grew, I knew fitting her in to the vacation would be a simple thing because she lives in the town where my dad grew up, and I would be visiting relatives in the area. We had a wonderful weekend hanging out together, talking about writing, wandering around soaking in inspiration, and actually doing some writing (Monica insisted). The memories will be cherished – and I thought my cheeks might break from laughing and smiling so much. After the weekend with Monica, I drove to visit Linda and loved wandering around the town on which she has based her fictional town for her paranormal mystery series. Of course, Linda may have panicked a bit when she almost got a house guest for a longer period of time than expected when I fell on her deck and twisted my ankle. Well, twisted is probably being nice… I ripped the ligaments to shreds. But I was able to ice and had some ace bandages with me to wrap the ankle with, so I moved on as planned.

I could go on and on (but I hear their groans about the length already). Both of these women mean more to me than words can say. They enrich my life, and I don’t know how I would have survived the past year without them.

The post The People of 2010 – Part VIII appeared first on Be the Cat.

There are so many words I could use to describe Eisley Jacobs (@EisleyJacobs) it’s not funny. It’s not a question of just where to start, but how to trim down. I could start with good-hearted, but that doesn’t come close. She is sweet, funny, devout, dedicated, enthusiastic, talented, wise, warm, caring… do you see what I mean? The list could go on and on. It’s even hard to say which of those characteristics (and by no means is that a complete list) I can say I cherish most about her. I was drawn to Eisley online for her optimism and enthusiasm. Always there with support for anyone who is struggling. Unafraid to question, and once an idea hits, she’s off like a rocket to fulfill her dreams. Eisley is currently in Ethiopia helping World Vision help the people of Ethiopia. She went to a church meeting one night, came back and announced she was going, raised the funds, and has been increasing in excitement ever since. I know she is blessing the life of everyone she comes in contact with, and I’m excited to hear her stories upon her return. Eisley sponsors a child in Ethiopia as well, but unfortunately she was unable to meet her this trip. Eisley shows this same enthusiasm for her writing projects, and has three fiction projects in various stages at the moment, one proposal for a non-fiction venture which is still waiting on a response, and the one which makes me smile probably the most; she will shortly launch her middle grade novel, Dragons Forever. Her love of this project has been evident all along the way and I have enjoyed hearing about reader feedback and how it has warmed her heart. I met Eisley at the now legendary RMFW conference, and if possible Eisley is even MORE in person than she is online. A true force of nature and I love and respect this woman more than I can say.

I first met Betty Viola Blue (@bettyviolablue) through the #wipfire hashtag. I have to say I was intrigued by her writing prowess, and that she wrote about demons in heaven and angels in hell helped to pique my interest. As good as she was when I first ran across her writing, Betty’s writing has improved and I have enjoyed watching her evolve as a writer. And I can’t think of too many people I’d rather have looking over my posted lines – her eye is keen, and her advice is always on the mark. I was a little confused at first when Jane Kindred (@JaneKindred) popped up periodically and made a statement I expected from Betty. It turns out Jane is Betty’s alter-ego and writing name, and I think Betty gets a little confused from time to time on which account she’s using. Now I just laugh when that happens. For the remainder of this post, I’ll refer to Jane as Betty because that is how I know her best, and since I met Betty/Jane at the same time in person, it will be easier. Online Betty can be a little quiet, popping in to make a comment, or (what’s even more fun) rant at life, and then will disappear to make the most fabulous baked goods known to man kind. She has half the Twitter population drooling with her descriptions. I first met Betty when I took a much needed, rambling vacation this past summer. Since I would be passing by San Francisco in my rambles, I thought it would be a shame not to meet Betty as I passed through. I am so glad I did. We met at a tea house, which had recently removed a car from its front window, and had a wonderful conversation about writing, editing, chasing the dream, and in general life’s obstacles. Betty is an absolute DOLL!!! When I made the decision to go the the RMFW conference, Betty was one of the first people I thought about cajoling into attending, so I could see her again and spend more time with her. One of my favorite memories from the conference was watching/listening to Betty speak Russian – it still makes me smile. During the conference Betty kept trying to find out whether her dream agent, Sara Megibow, was in attendance. Unfortunately she was not. But it turned out not to matter, because after the conference Betty resubmitted her work to Sara and is now repped by her dream agent. I couldn’t be happier for her. Betty has been working toward this dream relentlessly, and she has the talent that deserves to be recognized. And I for one feel my life is enriched by knowing her and can’t imagine being a writer without her in my life.

The post The People of 2010 – Part VII appeared first on Be the Cat.

As I was getting to know Branli, I noticed he would frequently communicate with someone named @snowppl and for some reason, @snowppl was to blame for something… well, everything. So I started peeping in on the conversation periodically and learned that @snowppl was actually Andrew Turner or Drew. I noticed that any time Branli racketed around the countryside, Drew was by his side. I became convinced they were actually Siamese twins separated at birth and virtually connected at the hip. Which made my first meeting with Branli highly unusual, because he came to meet me without Drew at his side, practically unheard of. Branli and Drew refer to themselves as each others non-romantic life partner, and their friendship is strong. I think they are good for one another because each helps to support the other through times of crisis and pushes them to strengthen areas where they may be weak. Drew has a caustic wit, and will leave you in stitches during the course of a conversation. He is a wonderful person to be around and one of the best huggers I know. Once he gains a little self-confidence, Drew is going to be unstoppable.

I feel blessed to have both of these gentlemen in my life, especially since they are close enough for us to get together a few times a year.

The post The People of 2010 – Part VI appeared first on Be the Cat.

I first met J Koyanagi (@JKoyanagi) online through the #wipfire hashtag, where we post lines from our current WIP (work in progress). The first thing I learned about J was that she had some of the most beautiful descriptive writing I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. Her imagery is so vivid it can hurt (and I mean that in a completely complimentary way). Her sensitivity to nature and the beauty which surrounds us is so developed and she has the ability to turn the phrase so well, I am in awe. She is truly an aesthete (and not the pretentious kind). J’s feedback on others writing is also well-considered and thought out. Her eyes on your work is definitely an asset. So I was very pleased when I heard she would also be attending the Rocky Mountain Fiction Writers Conference in Denver. J is just as true in person as she is online, and someone who experiences life at a seemingly different level from the masses – and this is a good thing. The other thing about J is that the great love of her life is her doberman, Esper. I love the pictures of Esper which are posted and the way J talks about her. She is family, just as my pups are family to me.

J’s roommate at the conference was someone I had the pleasure of meeting in person before when she attended SCBWI in Los Angeles. I first met Carolina Valdez Miller (@cvaldezmiller) online at the #amwritingparty offering wine and snacks (cheese and crackers maybe?) Carol is an absolute doll. She is hard-working, dedicated to her craft, and does some of the best Vlog’s I’ve seen. So if you haven’t seen them, you should hop on over to her website to view. Carol also write the young adult genre like I do, but we are at opposite ends of the spectrum. She writes for older YA and I write for the younger. She writes urban fantasy and I don’t even understand what that means (just kidding). I write contemporary realism. While it was good to see her for the couple hours out here in Los Angeles, I really enjoyed the time we were able to spend together in Denver. We talked, laughed, commiserated, cajoled, encouraged. She is determined to make it in this business and she will. A very talented writer, and wonderfully supportive friend. A dynamic combination.

The post The People of 2010 – Part V appeared first on Be the Cat.

Dawn blew into town on the night before the conference and joined the group for a bit as we all chatted about our travel, and which sessions were most important for us to attend. Dawn had her plan all mapped out and once the conference began, she executed her plan… which meant we barely saw her after that, or at least I saw her here and there, but didn’t get much of a chance to chat with her.

Frankie wasn’t actually attending the conference, but lived somewhere in the Denver greater metropolitan area, and she came by for pie after the first night. I tend to be the clueless one, and I didn’t even know what was going on until ordered to go have pie with Frankie. Well, I had coffee, but the group had a great time chatting and Frankie quickly became a member of the crew. So much so, that we snuck her in to the hospitality suite the next night. Shhhh – don’t tell anyone she was there.

Right up front, I’ll tell you that the graphic adorning this post was selected specifically because of Mireyah Wolfe. It reminded me soooo much of her, I had to use it. I really enjoyed meeting this fireball from podunk Louisiana and she made the conference memorable in more ways than one. Mires, as she is also called, kept threatening to go up in flames if she crossed the threshold of a church (which I for one wanted to see), and although the youngest of the group, definitely held her own in the conversations. One of my favorite memories (sorry Mireyah) is when she tried Sushi for the very first time. The facial expressions were priceless. Suffice it to say, Sushi is not going to be high on her list of favorite foods for quite some time. But what I admired was her determination to try the food, and to experience life. Plus, she now gets to use the experience in her writing. I can’t wait to see how.

The post The People of 2010 – Part IV appeared first on Be the Cat.

For example, we travel to and from work with Eve and know if there are any shady characters with her on the train. We also know when the bosses decide to to the unthinkable and actually give her stuff to work on. They should KNOW she has writing work to do that has NOTHING to do with the firm. What are they thinking, anyway… oh wait, they pay Eve for the pleasure of interrupting her writing time. Hmmmm. I guess we can’t complain too loudly then.

And Veronica – Just when you think she’s not around and hasn’t been paying attention to the stream flowing past her, she pops up. It makes me laugh almost every time. She either has a cogent question in response to the post, or has something snarky to say. You just have to love this girl.

I’m so glad I had the opportunity to get to know them at the conference and for them to join our growing Twitter family.

Addendum: One other person at the conference was Linda Baggus (@LindaBaggus), who is very sweet, and very enthusiastic about her writing. She just joined Twitter not too long ago, and needs to get more involved so give her a shout the next time you’re online.

The post The People of 2010 – Part III appeared first on Be the Cat.

I was unable to attend the SCBWI (Society of Children’s Book Writers & Illustrators) conference in Los Angeles this year due to scheduling conflicts, but I did manage to make the dash up to LA to meet some of my twitter friends because their closeness and the opportunity was not to be missed. In doing so, I was able to briefly meet Jessica Love (@_JessicaLove) and earmarked her twitter ID for future stalking … I mean … following. It was a brief meeting, but one of these days as time permits, I’d like to meet up with Jessica again, because I do like to be in touch with local writers. It is like breathing purified air when talking with local like-minded authors. Plus, I love supporting them in their endeavors.

Along with Jessica, I briefly met Heather Trese (@HeatherTrese). Unfortunately the meeting of Heather was brief because conferences can get crazy and she needed to get something to eat – foiled by another scheduling issue. I know I’ll have the chance to meet Heather again. Maybe at a conference we BOTH attend in the future. I’d love the chance to sit and talk with her for a while.

In my early days of Twitter, while I was trying to figure out how this social networking thing worked, I ran across the #amwritingparty hashtag. This is where Twitter really started to gel for me and I came to meet some of the most amazing people I know. I met the creator of the #amwritingparty hashtag, Sara McClung (@saramcclung) at SCBWI Los Angeles. In fact, she was one of the people I specifically drove there to meet. Sara is a great cheerleader for writers online, giving words of encouragement to others and leading by example of getting the job done. She’s not online as frequently as she used to be because she is focused on getting her own work honed until it shines.

And last (for this post anyway) and in no way least, I met up with Janelle Alexander (@JanelleAlexandr), another local S. CA writer, in a Starbucks for coffee and writing. Janelle and I have frequently talked about putting together a writer’s retreat (one where actual writing is done, so anyone who reads this who is going to attend KNOWS we WILL be writing) and ONE OF THESE DAYS we are going to make it happen. Maybe 2011 is our year. Janelle loves meeting up with other local writers, so if you’re in the area, you should give her a shout.

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